You and I both know there's news, and then there's "news." When I wake up in the morning and am ready to know what's going on in the world, I head to BBC. Everyone has his/her favorite source and I'm not here to make a political statement; I just like the BBC because it acknowledges the goings on of things outside Brangelina's castle walls.
American news sources can be hard to wade through, and I find myself getting caught up in conspiracy-theory type thought patterns when I accidentally land on FOX or CNN. In my small mind, American people have dark motivations and Europeans have...lovely accents. It's a well known fact that no nefarious person ever had a British accent. Just ask James Bond.
As important as it is to me to keep abreast of global and local happening, I'm not going to lie to you. I love me some "news." So there I was this morning, skipping through a blooming field of bright yellow stories (you're welcome, single reader who got that reference to yellow journalism), when I stumbled on this title:
Parents accuse restaurant of accidentally serving kids Mimosas
Let me be the first person to call BALONEY on the word accidentally. You show me a server who hasn't had a few creative ideas for dealing with annoying children and I'll hand you the keys to my mom car (baby included). Unless you wait tables at Chuck E Cheese, you will always, without fail, cringe when you get sat with any human under the age of 12. It's a natural, involuntary response to the guaranteed mess, the high-pitched whine of an exhausted parent, begging the child to stop throwing mozzarella sticks like missiles at the adjoining table. Any server with an ounce of honesty in his blood will tell you the kid is the real WMD.
So when I read this short article, I wasn't fooled by the restaurant's apology. Especially not after I read the parents are considering taking further legal action. The unmistakable mark of a parent who refuses to take responsibility for his/her child is a lawsuit, right? These kids were probably acting horrid, the parents were rudely oblivious, and the clever server had a solution.
Ok, ok. Maybe it was a mistake. In fact, probably it was a mistake. It would be fiscally foolish to charge someone for an OJ, and serve her alcohol. But...come on. All you childless people out there would secretly give that server an award for making your dinner out more pleasant. And parents? Who among us didn't think for just two seconds, Brilliant. Genius. Might try it at Thanksgiving. We won't, of course; we're parents, not wait staff.
For those of you huffing about, feeling judgy right now, let me direct you to my other favorite "news" source, Jack Van Impe. He (and probably the suit-happy parents of the tipsy pre-teens) is convinced that little incidents like this are apocalyptic predictors. In fact, Jack and his sweet wife Rexella (yep, Rexella) can prove this world is going to hell, and the hand-basket we're all riding will be stocked with champagne, orange juice, and two-year-olds (2nd Timothy 3:11).
Read the article. Watch a few minutes of Jack & Rexella. And then, for the love of heaven, lighten up. Even if just for a day. The world is a truly serious place. You'll know that if you get your news from the BBC like me. But it's also a beautiful place for us lucky ones. Maybe let's worry a little less about the end of the world, and a little more about how we can use our time between now and then.
I'm not going to suggest you spend your time serving minors alcohol, but if you want to leave the grape juice out on the counter way longer than you should, I won't judge.
American news sources can be hard to wade through, and I find myself getting caught up in conspiracy-theory type thought patterns when I accidentally land on FOX or CNN. In my small mind, American people have dark motivations and Europeans have...lovely accents. It's a well known fact that no nefarious person ever had a British accent. Just ask James Bond.
As important as it is to me to keep abreast of global and local happening, I'm not going to lie to you. I love me some "news." So there I was this morning, skipping through a blooming field of bright yellow stories (you're welcome, single reader who got that reference to yellow journalism), when I stumbled on this title:
Parents accuse restaurant of accidentally serving kids Mimosas
Let me be the first person to call BALONEY on the word accidentally. You show me a server who hasn't had a few creative ideas for dealing with annoying children and I'll hand you the keys to my mom car (baby included). Unless you wait tables at Chuck E Cheese, you will always, without fail, cringe when you get sat with any human under the age of 12. It's a natural, involuntary response to the guaranteed mess, the high-pitched whine of an exhausted parent, begging the child to stop throwing mozzarella sticks like missiles at the adjoining table. Any server with an ounce of honesty in his blood will tell you the kid is the real WMD.
So when I read this short article, I wasn't fooled by the restaurant's apology. Especially not after I read the parents are considering taking further legal action. The unmistakable mark of a parent who refuses to take responsibility for his/her child is a lawsuit, right? These kids were probably acting horrid, the parents were rudely oblivious, and the clever server had a solution.
Ok, ok. Maybe it was a mistake. In fact, probably it was a mistake. It would be fiscally foolish to charge someone for an OJ, and serve her alcohol. But...come on. All you childless people out there would secretly give that server an award for making your dinner out more pleasant. And parents? Who among us didn't think for just two seconds, Brilliant. Genius. Might try it at Thanksgiving. We won't, of course; we're parents, not wait staff.
For those of you huffing about, feeling judgy right now, let me direct you to my other favorite "news" source, Jack Van Impe. He (and probably the suit-happy parents of the tipsy pre-teens) is convinced that little incidents like this are apocalyptic predictors. In fact, Jack and his sweet wife Rexella (yep, Rexella) can prove this world is going to hell, and the hand-basket we're all riding will be stocked with champagne, orange juice, and two-year-olds (2nd Timothy 3:11).
Read the article. Watch a few minutes of Jack & Rexella. And then, for the love of heaven, lighten up. Even if just for a day. The world is a truly serious place. You'll know that if you get your news from the BBC like me. But it's also a beautiful place for us lucky ones. Maybe let's worry a little less about the end of the world, and a little more about how we can use our time between now and then.
I'm not going to suggest you spend your time serving minors alcohol, but if you want to leave the grape juice out on the counter way longer than you should, I won't judge.
Comments
Post a Comment