Skip to main content

Mom. MOM. Mom, mom, mom, mom MOM!!! Mom.

Right now, I mean at this exact moment, my daughter is shoveling Kix cereal into her mouth. There is juice dripping off her chin. She has one kix (or is it a kick?) lodged in her post-nap afro. She is breathing   really, really loud through her mouth because she has a stuffy nose. And as busy as she is with all that, she's also saying over and over, "I want play game on dat. I want play game on dat. Mom. Mom, mom, mom. I want play game on dat."

She is not going to get to play game on dat. Dat is my computer and dat doesn't even have any games. I have no idea what kind of fun she imagines happens on this machine, but she's wrong. I work on here, and work is the opposite of fun. And even if I had 107 kid-oriented games, I wouldn't let her play them because I'm mean. Or at least that's what I'm sure she thinks.

But here's what I think:

I think three year olds are old enough to entertain themselves for more than three seconds at a time.

I think I'm overqualified to fetch cereal and wash hands and change clothes all day long.

I think reading the same book 5 times in a row probably is important developmentally, but I'm still going to burn that thing in my fireplace after she goes to bed. My apologies, Louisville Public Library.

I think cuteness, even sweetness, isn't always a match for exhaustion.

I think. Scratch that. I know I need a break.

But where could I possibly go that would be better than this?


Please don't say Wyoming. That would be demoralizing.

Comments

  1. Kimberly...this is wonderful. Why am I just now getting it?
    Miss you

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Who are you unknown? I'm 100% sure I miss you too, but who ARE you?

      Delete

Post a Comment

Popular posts from this blog

We're Off to the Icecapades! And Other Roads Paved With Cold Tears.

You know how your Great Aunt Margaret always looks at your baby's long fingers and says she's going to be a piano player? And how that guy bagging your groceries always tells you your slightly-taller-than-average boy is going to be a basketball player? Or how, when you accidentally leave the scissors on the counter and your toddler gets ahold of them, she's going to be a Monster Truck driver for three months because of that sweet mullet she gives herself? Well...I've got a long-legged African baby. And let me tell you, folks, she's destined to be a runner. At least that's what I've been told by no less than three thousand people in the last two years. If qualifying for the Olympics happened based on popular vote of the people, Ayana would have run last year. It would have been a staggering disappointment for Americans everywhere, but she'd have been there. (Shut up, fact checkers. I know the summer Olympics didn't happen last year.) But here...

In the Background

Judging by my Instagram feed, K-12 kids are starting back to school in CO. After approximately 18 years at home in 2020, some are headed back into the germy trenches and others are unsuccessfully logging into 26 different apps and carefully choosing which Zoom background will go with their new sweatpants. And the question for parents across the nation is: How are you feeling? That's a lob, right? Pretty damn terrible ought to cover it. No choice was a good choice and many (most?) didn't get to choose anyway. OK, sure. There's maybe two people reading this who think COVID is a hoax. Hey, guys. I see you. I'm glad you keep reading my blog even though we're really different people. I'm also glad you'll be able to enjoy your kid-free time for the first time in 6 months. Truly. Mazel tov. For the rest of us, it's a fraught day. And when I try to think of how to answer that question— How are you feeling?— all I can think is that this feels just like getting s...

31 Things I Learned Before 32

Tomorrow, I turn 32. So with no more ado or fanfare than that, I share with you 31 things I've learned in 31 years of life. In no particular order and with no promised gravity. The Golden Rule doesn't ensure you'll get treated the way you wish to be treated. It just means you can sleep at night, knowing you did right. Sandal tans garner an inexplicable degree of respect and admiration. The book is always better than the movie. So all you book snobs out there can just hush up about it. We know. (Yes, I'm a total book snob. But I'm so snobby I don't even try the movie. You're welcome.) If you don't water the plants, the plants die. When you're going through some shit and people tell you, "I could never do what you doing," the appropriate response is: "Yes you could. You just haven't had to." Dog people have hair all over everything and cat peoples' houses smell funny (which is a nice way of saying bad ). Children a...